First Time Baking: Bolu Kukus

I first learned baking when I was in junior high. A course called "home industry" was introduced to all students from first grade to third grade of SMP (US: grade 7 to 9). The teacher taught us to make many kinds of food, from pineapple jam, egg peanuts, salted eggs, egg noodle, and many, many more. Bolu Kukus (Indonesian steamed cupcake) was one of them, and it was one of the most memorable ones to me.

A couple of days ago, after getting all the necessary ingredients and the basic baking tools, e.g. mixer, scale, etc. I finally got to experiment again using the recipe that I found here on YouTube. It turned out pretty good with a couple mistakes I  made: by accidentally adding baking oil, instead of food color, and the taste I found it a bit too sweet. However, amazingly, they flowered up nicely.

First time made - Bolu Kukus

Last night, I did try to bake again with more confident for a second time, with less sugar. However, it turned out to come out quite the opposite with what I expected.

 

Second attempt in making bolu kukus - no smile x_x

I was screaming when I opened up the cover, seeing my cakes weren't smiling. I wasn't sure what made it fail this time. As I was carefully wiped all the tools I used to make sure they were all dry. Besides reducing the amount of sugar, the difference I made from the first time that I didn't boil the water with the steamer on top of it, since I wanted to keep it 100% dry. I wonder if that could be the reason.

Hm, I guess I just have to keep trying to make sure that I really know how to make this one of my favorite cakes. As my husband also motivated me, saying, "Practice makes perfect!" :)

Confession of A Shopaholic

Shopping is one of my biggest hobbies. When I was single, I went shopping about once a week. Shopping was like my medicine whenever I got bored or in a bad mood. I love to shop for anything, especially when it comes to clothing, shoes, handbags, etc. Back then, every time I saw something I like, things that come into my consideration were: the price, the material, and if I hadn't owned anything similar. If all three were "Yes" then I would grab and bring it to the cashier right away. I ended up having a huge collection of clothing and other stuff which I didn't get to wear them often.

After I got married, I have been learning to spend the money more wisely and carefully.With that said, I have to consider a lot more than what I did in the past when I go out to shop. My basic principle is only to spend on what is needed, e.g. food and household necessities. However, at times it is very hard for me to resist the temptation to shop again, especially when I see people dressing up so beautifully, with nice make-up, accessories, bag, and shoes. So, after a few months of holding back my desire to shop, I went shopping again yesterday, and ended up buying 2 pair of pants and a summer dress. However, after I left the store, I felt guilty for buying them. I have been thinking whether or not I should return some of them. 

There are several reasons that make me think that I shouldn't have bought them. One reason why I felt guilty was that I violated my basic principle. I bought them just because I like them; the color, the cut, the pattern were very nice on me. They are also very comfortable, and not to mention that they are in-style. Another reason was that I was afraid if my bad habit would come back. Even though I don't shop as much as before, but somehow I am still very attracted to buy new clothes once in awhile, especially during the sale season, knowingly that there are still plenty of clothes at home. Moreover, just about a week ago, I was mad at my husband for I thought he was wasting money by buying lunch outside, though that time was already pretty late, and we both had not yet ate much since the morning. Because of this selfishness of mine, I felt guiltier by buying  those new clothes for my own pleasure. So, on my way back home, I thought again about my doing in spending about $50 on those 3 new clothes, especially the dress.

On the other hand, I thought that it is normal for girls (and women too) to look charming, as lots of people advice the married women to maintain their appearance, not only for themselves, but also for the husband. However, I questioned myself if keeping up with the fashion trend is the right way to look attractive. The older generation might say that we can always look nice by dressing up appropriately, clean, and neatly, which I somehow agree. So, does it mean I should really return them though I like them so much? After I talked to my husband, and somehow confessed about this "sin", my husband graciously told me that I don't need to return them, and would like me to keep the dress for our future dates. I was so touched by his response, and decided to keep all of them as he said. Though I promised to control myself more with this habit in the future. Please help me, Lord!

All in all, after a deep thought and reflection about this issue, and how to solve this problem of mine, I was reminded by what Jesus taught in His sermon "Therefore, I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?" (Matthew 6:25) Moreover, the Scripture also says that, "...beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." (1 Peter 3:4-5) For "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." (Proverbs 31:30)

Maintaining Balance Between Work and Family

I have been thinking about how people live to maintain the balance between their work and family. In New York, most husband and wife work to fulfill their family needs. Many are even taking extra courses while working and taking care of their family. The issue is how then we, as a woman, should use our time wisely to manage our time in earning extra bucks from working outside and still be able to nurture our family.

I thought I always have a lot of time to do more work than what I have right now. However, when there is extra work comes, I always tend to get stressed out, even though my husband has always been very understanding and helpful to me. When I am in a rush, I often neglect him unintentionally. And that usually happens in the morning, especially when I was rushing to go to work (poor my hubby). But he's always so patiently caring and helping me with my morning tasks, such as making the bed and preparing breakfast for me to eat on the train. I can never thank God enough for giving me such a blessing through my husband.

Right now my activities are somehow pretty simple.Yet, I still haven't been able to manage to do all of them in my daily routine. Besides that, I am now trying to get a part/full time job, which will require a much better time-management skill and discipline in every area.

Here are a list of my activities so far:
- Doing household chores, e.g. cooking, grocery shopping, laundry, cleaning.
- Studying for pharmacy technician exam (have to take within 2 months or so)
- Doing the Church database. 
- Bible study/devotion
- Learning Chinese (under my husband's teaching)
- Sunday School preparation
- Teaching piano

So, what if I
- wake up at 7am,
- 1 hour - morning devotional time(+Chinese learning)
- 1 hour - preparing for the day + breakfast + dinner menu
- 3 hours - Study pharmacy exam  (9-12pm)
- 30 mins - break
- 1 hour - Study pharmacy exam again (until 1:30pm)
- 2 hours - Church Database (until 3:30pm)
- 1 hour - teaching piano
- 5pm - start cooking
- 8pm - dinner time
- 9:30pm - shower
- 10pm - Night devotional time
- 11 - Free time (Sunday School Prep / Reading / internet / etc)
- 12 - bed time

Hm... looks pretty good. Let's see if I can keep up with this schedule starting next Monday. However, there are still little things that I must do next week, including interview preparation, choir practice, and car inspection.

Hopefully I will have enough discipline to do all these in spite of little unplanned things that might come up in between.

Lord, though I am weak, but You are strong. Please give me Your strength to do all these tasks in my daily routine with the joy from You alone. With a humble heart that I may follow Your guidance to live according to Your will. In Jesus' name, Amen!

Sinning Against God

Today during the worship time at CCCNY, I somehow could not concentrate to listen to the whole sermon, since my mind was wandering off about half of the time for several reasons. And one of them was when I heard a cell phone ringing during the sermon, and then it was accidentally put on speaker for about 3 seconds, when the lady tried to answer it. My eyes reflexively got drifted to where the voice was from, thinking "Who is that? Didn't she know that she's in a church?" One second later, I turned my head back, trying to bring my focus back to the preacher’s message. But again, this time I got caught by the sight of someone who's sitting in front of me. She kept staring at the cell phone lady. At this moment, I was grumbling again at her in my heart, "Why do you keep staring at her? Like you have never made a mistake." However, shortly after, I was being questioned in my heart as well, "Why do you keep on judging others?"

What shall I conclude then? Am I any better than the other two women?

Let's think about it thoroughly, who in this situation is better than the others. Looking at it from one point of view, I think I am quite alright here, even though I do make mistakes too sometimes. First of all, I always put my cell phone on silent before walking into a church, and never answer a call during a sermon. Secondly, I didn't give a hatred look when I looked at the cell phone lady. So, I would say I was pretty considerate and forgiving. However, based on my first reactions to both of the women, it was not an act of forgiveness, especially to the second woman. I was judging her based on my own "goodness". Jesus has taught, "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." (Matthew 7:1-2) But does it mean that we are not allowed to judge at all? How could that be possible? For example, when I am buying something, first thing I do is comparing one to the others; then I take whichever I think is best. Here is judgment taking place. It is the same way with choosing friends. As Psalm 1:1 says "Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers." So we do have to judge who is wicked, sinners, or mockers. The problem now is how we make the right judgment in every situation.

 Jesus said in John 8:16, "But if I do judge, my decisions are right, because I am not alone. I stand with the Father, who sent me." So, the only way to make correct judgment is if we stand clearly with God. It is right for the woman in front of me to stare at the cell phone lady the way she did, as she knew a careless mistake, such as forgetting to turn off the cell phone, was not only disturbing others, but on top of that, it was completely disrespectful towards God. It shows that she wasn't serious about being in a church, in the house of God. Everyone should revere God more than anything else, as He is the King of kings. Imagining if we are before a king in a serious meeting, which at the end the King will proclaim His decision that whoever pleases Him will stay alive, and those whom He condemns will receive death penalty. There is no second chance. We all would certainly behave very differently than how we usually do. We would do everything and anything to please the King, so that He would let us live. However, if in the middle of the meeting when the King is talking, and all of a sudden our phone rings, then we could probably guess what we would deserve later at the end.

Moreover, when I reflect again about my initial thought towards those two women, I realized that my judgment was not reverent to God, for I seek to please myself, instead of Him. It is my pride, jealousy, and possibly hatred, which led me to self-righteousness. If all three of us were in the judgment room, I would have certainly deserved no more than what the cell phone lady deserved, for my crime which was unknown to men, was committed exclusively against God. It was not about forgiving others by being considerate. In this circumstance, I was guilty with my thoughts to take God’s place in deciding who should or shouldn’t be forgiven. All in all, I shouldn’t have let my surrounding take away my heart and mind during the worship service in the first place, and with a humble heart shall I enter His presence.


Against you, you only, have I sinned, and done what is evil in your sight, so that you are proved right when you speak and justified when you judge. (Psalm 51:4)